I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
