with your own penis?
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.