we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
