been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
