Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
