I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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