Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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