he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
