yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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