SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
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