apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
