I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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