Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
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