i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
