i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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