kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
