My cat gives me a boner
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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