you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
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I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
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Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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