we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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