Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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