Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
