I think I am morally bankrupt
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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