i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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