Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
