just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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