I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Randomize
