Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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