Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Randomize
