Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
you had me at cake vodka
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.