I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Randomize
