My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
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