btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize