You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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