ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I wish life had little blips of pornography
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
We're too hungover to prance.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize