No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
