Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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