No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
