took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
the day after is always just damage control
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
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