I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
