this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
