nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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