You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
