Got a toothbrush?
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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