I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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