dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
