I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
she told me i tasted like america
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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