Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
we're making bets on your personal life
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
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