This house was built for laser tag.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
