So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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