TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
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